HOW WE HELP
What We Do
△ support for expectant and new parents using our
unique SOS ‘lifeline’, part of the Super Start Guide
△ ‘incredible’ sleep plans age 0-6
△ freedom from unwanted sleep associations such as
feeding/ rocking/ staying/ sucking
△ ending unnecessary night wakes for good
△ nap mastery 0-4 years
△ transforming bedtimes
△ early starts banished
△ troubleshooting/ overcoming natural obstacles to sleep
Results We Frequently Enable
△ 6+ hours solid sleep from 4 months
△ 12+ hours solid sleep from 6+ months
△ ‘life-changing’ results within 3-5 days
△ restorative, predictable naps lasting up to 3 hours
△ relaxed and enjoyable bedtimes
△ ‘start the day’ times that work for your family
△ more predicable, consistent, calm days
△ solid sleep that’s ’future-proof’
Benefits of Our Service
△ happier parents: less shouting, arguing, losing control, snapping, withdrawing, resentment, chaos, bitterness, division and tears
△ happier children: transformation in mood, behaviour, energy, ability to listen and share, reason and regulate, improved immunity, appetite and health, child’s sense of confidence and achievement is enhanced
△ vast improvements to mental health (several clients attribute coming off anti-depressants to the sleep support)
△ physical health often completely turned around
△ more deeply attached parent/ child bond. Parents who are more emotionally available and present
△ familial relationships repaired and reconnected
△ sleeping in the same bed as the one you love
△ having the time, space and energy to live the life you envision
Here are just some of the words our families use to describe us, our plans and our support:
△ 'sleep disciples'
△ 'sanity saviours'
△ 'peace restorers'
△ 'bond builders'
△ 'Florence Nightingale of sleep'
△ 'best investment ever'
We could talk to you all day about WHAT we do and HOW we do it (and that’s important, too, of course.)
But what propels us forward, what keeps our hearts full and our heads engaged is our WHY.
For us, it’s beautifully simple and doesn’t need any real thought, because it comes from deep within. We do our work to heal families and bring them back together. To give children back their happy, emotionally available, more rational, playful parents. The parents they deserve. The parents that are waiting under the exhaustion, plagued with guilt, desperate to return. We do it to lift marriages and relationships under immense strain. To ease troubled minds. To provide freedom from back-breaking patterns and restrictive fears and beliefs about sleep. We enable you to take down the destructive barrier of broken sleep so that life can happen without you wishing it away because you’re so defeated. Please don’t hesitate to contact us if you’d like to more info on our how.
Our Mission Statement
As long as the time difference and languages you speak permit it, Calm & Bright’s hand of support can reach right across the globe and into your home, leading you safely and gently by the hand to a better, brighter future fuelled by solid sleep.
We believe in empowering parents to enable their own children to achieve solid sleep. We don’t come into your home and do it for you (where would that leave you when you are faced with your next sleep challenge such as a holiday, illness, a house move or a new baby?) Instead, we facilitate incredible change through you. Our remote support means that wherever you live, you will get the same unrivalled level of support. Every client quote and testimonial you will read are from parents who’ve been helped in this way. The result is parents who are more confident in themselves and their abilities, better equipped to read and interpret their children’s cues, and empowered with all the tools to happily overcome any future sleep hurdles they may be faced with.
We believe that decisions which come from a place of fear cannot be as great and as good as decisions that come from a place of love. We also believe that parenting is very often about making the decision to take the less easy path for the greater good. To give our children what they need over what they have come to believe they want.
Often it seems easier to ‘give in’ (and we are often too tired to have the energy for anything else). But the path of least resistance often leads us unwittingly to more long-term difficulty. The decision to skilfully and lovingly take on small battles (that feel like hard work at the time) leads to longer term peace and harmony for the whole family.
It’s not just our child’s resistance that we are faced with when we consider embarking on any kind of sleep teaching. As parents, our own fears, experiences and insecurities, often dictate our parenting decisions, however subconsciously.
Eve has written a poem called ‘Untangled’ (free download here) about the importance of separating our own ‘stuff’ from our child’s, so that we can parent effectively and objectively, with the greatest love. This kind of awareness helps us to avoid projecting our own fears and insecurities onto our children. We do not want to validate their belief that they can’t sleep without us by rushing in to ‘rescue’ them every time they decide they ‘need’ us. In doing so we are saying ‘You’re quite right, you can’t do this by yourself. Here I am to save the day’. This is a far less empowering/ confidence-giving message than ‘I am here, I love you, you can do this. And I will be here the whole time while you do.’
It is, of course, essential that we respond when our children require us to. But it is just as vital that we respond in the right way. It is our duty to give our children safe, predictable, consistent boundaries within which they can experience a childhood that sees them grow, develop and flourish. Boundaries are not restrictive. Sleep associations that shackle us to ways of doing things that don’t work for our family are what restricts us. A childhood without boundaries feels unsafe and unpredictable for both parent and child. Boundaries laid down with true love are the enablers of freedom, security, and opportunity. Our children will have a thousand friends, but only one set of parents. Let’s do our best to get it right for them.
We know we are not alone in our belief that one of the greatest gifts we can give our children – alongside their physical and mental health, their emotional wellbeing and their education – is solid, reparative sleep.
Crying/ Protest/ Upset
It is not ever pleasant for anyone when their child is upset. But neither is seeing your child not getting the full amount of sleep they need night after night, week after week, month after month. The resulting tiredness, irritability, lack of concentration/ patience/ rationality/ tolerance and joy for life that your child (and anyone else in the family who’s been woken) experiences as a result makes every day so much harder and more like an endurance test rather than a pleasure and an opportunity for new, happy experiences and memories to be built together.
The first night of the teaching can very often mean less crying than normal. When we are faced with our children’s tears and angry protest, we should remember that they are not upset because they feel abandoned or unloved by us (our actions throughout the teaching in the daylight hours as well as at night give the opposite message). They are instead, cross about the unexpected change in our behaviour (because this new stuff is ‘NOT WHAT YOU AGREED!!’) They feel unsure and uncertain that they can do it any other way yet, because we as their parents unknowingly reinforce their belief that there isn’t any other way to do it. Each time we do that ‘ing’ (feeding, staying, rocking, holding, co-sleeping), we strengthen the learned behaviour. We have done this not because we got it wrong or failed, but because we haven’t known any other way. And the way we did it worked once, even if it doesn’t work now.
As our children find themselves doing sleep themselves – being able to fall off to sleep and get themselves back to sleep without any angst or difficulty (almost always within a matter of days and sometimes even hours) their confidence in themselves and their ability grows!
Eve’s 10 month old daughter had a breakthrough on the very first night, and has slept 12 solid hours every night of her eleven years of life since then (bar when she‘s ill, of course!)
As parents, this empowerment that you have the privilege of witnessing in your children during the sleep support, is a marvellous thing that you yourself have enabled. Parents are astounded by the scale of the changes and how relatively easy it was.
For those that choose to happily bed share/ bed hop/ keep up any sleep associations with their children that work for them, and it doesn’t disturb their sleep and suits their family – how fantastic! We would wholeheartedly recommend you continue. Because you are the expert in your child. But for those for whom bed hopping and night visits have stopped working, C&B can help you and support you in making that incredible change in what is usually just a few short days.